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How to Manage Anxiety in Everyday Life: Tips from Santa Monica Therapists

By January 17, 2025No Comments

 

 

Your anxious mind will tell you lies. Not to hurt you, but to protect you. Treat it as a well meaning, friend.

Anxiety and Self- Preservation

Self-preservation is one of the most basic and important functions of the nervous system. It’s a deep-rooted, compulsive instinct present in just about every living thing, and we are no different. We all carry this instinct with us: an emotional alarm system designed to protect us from harm. However, sometimes our alarm system can misfire and turn into anxiety. When you feel anxious, ask yourself these questions:

  • Is the harm real or imagined?
  • Is it based on past hurt?
  • Is it helping us or hurting me now? 

Your instincts, those feelings, they aren’t wrong, they’ve just been taught to alert you to things that you may not need to be afraid of anymore. When we get upset about being anxious, anxiety only increases. What would happen if you accepted this anxiety and instead looked at it with curiosity and compassion? Look deep inside yourself and ask yourself what this anxiety is protecting you from.

 

 

Befriending-Your-Anxious-Mind

Anxiety and Acceptance

Anxiety can be frustrating, overwhelming, and scary. Naturally, you have an urge to fight these feelings. Instead of fighting the feelings you’re experiencing internally, try to accept them without judgment as appropriate responses to situations. All feelings are normal, even the negative ones. Feelings can sometimes be uncomfortable, and we may attempt not to feel them, or work very hard to change them and get frustrated when they don’t change. When we judge ourselves and fight what IS, that (the emotions, for example) only get stronger. We may think we shouldn’t feel this way, which also does not help to lessen the emotions. Instead, try practicing Acceptance. Acceptance is the willingness to open up and make space for uncomfortable feelings, sensations, urges, and emotions. It means not trying to control our inner experience or someone else’s experience. It may seem counterintuitive, but by accepting your feelings, you’ll be able to remove them from the forefront of your attention, leaving space for the rest of you.

Acceptance and Commitment Therapy 

Acceptance is our willingness to recognize what the current reality is, no matter how indesirable it is, and allow that reality to exist without trying to change it. Acceptance is seeing the pain and the joy, and welcoming both. One excellent way to practice acceptance is Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT). ACT teaches mindfulness skills to help individuals live in a way that’s consistent with their personal values and helps in developing psychological flexibility. Putting your focus on living according to your values could help you rise to difficult challenges and put your best foot forward without the fear of failure. If your anxiety is becoming overwhelming from day to day, the best thing you can do for yourself is reach out to a therapist in your area. Knowing about tools is one thing, but actually implementing them into your everyday life is another. It can be challenging, but there is help out there. Put yourself first and contact a therapist today.